Samuel Leo Fisher (samuelleofisher) wrote in bullet_heaven,
Samuel Leo Fisher
samuelleofisher
bullet_heaven

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And so I die

 

He had stopped fighting...

The bullet that had pierced right through his abdomen, the bullet that he had always managed to dodge had come in and out of his body, leaving a bloody mess behind the wall. He smiled through the horrible pain that now consumed him. Getting a bullet through the stomach wasn’t a pleasant death. He knew. He had seen it before, but never felt it.

What the hell... God knows he was old. Perhaps too old for this. It was better like this. In truth, he never thought he would die any other way, although he was allowed to have fantasies about it. While on the field, he had thought about how it would’ve been like to just die comfortably on his bed while sleeping. The thought seemed ridiculous to him. It was too peaceful for a man of violence, a man of action, a military man. Since he had entered the Army first in order to pay for his studies, he had prepared himself for the day that he would die on the field.

He could hear Grim at the other end, the panic on her voice increasing whenever he wouldn’t reply for a long time. She knew he was dying, and regretted the day that she asked him to come back to the NSA. He was nearly in sixties by now. She was nearly on her fifties, yet her voice hadn´t changed as much. He was sure going to miss that voice. He was going to miss her hands...

 It hurt him to hear her sobbing, asking him to stay alive. He knew he could try, but no matter much he could try, the escape artist could not escape this time. The only thing he could do, was to calm her down, sometimes with jokes that she didn´t appreciate.

But it was better this way. Better him than her.

“I´m sorry I didn´t tell you before... I-I...”

“Sam...”, she cut him off at the other end of the line. It was as if she knew he was going to say something she was going to regret. “ I-I know...”

He smiled a little, not quite happy with himself. “Steak... d-dinner? I-I´ll p...”

“Please...” He was already talking things that made no sense, and she was already crying.

The light at the end of the tunnel came to him after a long while of pain, and the pain itself left his body, being replaced by the cold of his hands. He figured how it must´ve looked through thermal: his body going blue. A song popped into his head as his sense of humor came back to him to calm his fears again, that nineties song about ´being blue´ that Sarah liked and he never understood.

“Sarah...”

His expression changed. The smile disappeared. Oh he was going to miss her above all things. But things were in order. No parents should have to bury their kids, much less having to do that twice.

But it was better this way. Better him than her. 

Whatever and whatnot, Sam knew he was going to see Grim and Sarah again... hopefully...

“God... forgive me...” After all, everyone ended up praying at that last moment, and doing that prevented him from panicking. It sure helped, and he found himself closing his eyes and letting go. 

--------------------------------

A breeze hit his face as he rested on his back. He opened his eyes slowly, the bright sun hitting his face, yet not burning him. It felt incredibly good, and for some reason, he felt much better. His hands tried to get a hold on something, but found nothing but sand, wet sand in fact. He touched his abdomen, and found to his surprise that he was wearing the short sleeved, knee-long, diver suit he liked to wear whenever he was on vacation and diving with his daughter. 

Sam sat up quickly, inspecting the injury again and looked around him somewhat paranoid, yet a sense of peace overwhelmed him and calmed him as he gazed at the forever crystalline sea in front of him. This seemed surreal. The sea itself was incredible. He could overlook some island, and the place met no end.

“The Bahamas... 1983...” One of few vacations. He recognized the place, but even like that, it looked better than it had ever looked. Way too good.

 

Tags: entrypost, samuelleofisher
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